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Monday, November 01, 2010

Oh, the Humanity! Michigan Football Explodes


(from MZone wire reports) State College, PA --  Michigan's once-proud football program exploded in a fireball of suck Saturday night when the Wolverines were beaten 41-31 by Penn State. During the game, the U-M defense let a 3rd string walk-on QB making his first start look like the second coming of Joe Montana.

While officials are still at the crash site, sources tell the MZone that the investigation is focusing on the ship's captain, Rich Rodriguez.  Before Rodriguez took over at the helm, Michigan football hadn't had a losing season in 40+ years.  But after back-to-back losing seasons and a third season that was rapidly beginning to unravel, speculation is mounting that pilot error by Rodriguez may have driven the winningest program in the history of college football straight into the fucking ground.

Sadly, MZone cameras were at the scene of the disaster and captured the exclusive video below.

WARNING: This video contains graphic images of a tradition-rich football program blowing up like Gerg's D-line on a simple off-tackle run.  Viewer discretion - especially if you bleed Maize and Blue - is advised.


BaggyPantsDevil said...

It was unforgivebly rude of Penn State to put the 1994 Nittany Lions on the field.

Michigan just needs to practice more. Oh, wait, no that doesn't work either.

Mikoyan said...

Why do I have this nagging feeling I will get to repeat this on Saturday and in two weeks from Saturday?

srudoff said...

wasn't he also the captain of the exxon valdez??

first time i ever laughed out loud at my word verification: uustudd

Christian said...

In case you guys haven't noticed, our offense (which RichRod heads up) isn't too shabby. Our defense (which he trusts his defensive coaches to handle) is the issue. But to give ANY coach the players (or lack thereof) we have in the secondary and expect them to be decent is a freaking joke. I still don't understand how some people don't get that.

Firing Rodriquez would be a mistake.

CA MI Fan said...

Maybe it is not the D Coordinator, but the cronies of Dick Rod that have remained on the defensive staff. Dick Rod may need to take an internal look at who his staff/friends are or he will need to find a new job.

Andy said...


I have been a strong supporter of RR since he came to Michigan. But I am done.

But at some point, the issues need to stop being someone else's problem. He is not the offensive coordinator, he is the head coach. As such, he is responsible for the entire team.

I understand we have young players all over the field. Young players who are supposed to have talent AND displayed enough of that talent to play D1 football. I am not a football coach, but I am pretty sure these kids knew how to tackle and cover in high school.

My biggest issue is the fear our defense plays with. The three man rush is easily neutralized by five offensive linemen. There is no aggressiveness. Virtually no blitzing. Our linebackers are tentative and poor tacklers. Time and time again we are so far away from the opposing wide outs that it is funny.

BaggyPantsDevil said...


College coaches aren't "given" athletes, part of their job is to identify, assess and recruit the athletes they need and then to develop those athletes. This is why the Rodriguez-Apologist excuse of “the secondary has so many freshman” doesn’t work.

The statements Rodriguez recently made about not being too hard on the secondary since they were recently in high school is correct and does sound better than his usual excuses. But, he still has the ultimate responsibility for the secondary’s shortcomings through the confluence of recruiting guys that could not get admitted to the school, losing guys that transferred from a big name program where they were all but guaranteed playing time, and simply not having enough depth and experience in case of injuries.

I agree that the athletes themselves do not deserve criticism because at this point in their college careers they should be red-shirting or seeing limited game time to gradually learn the college game. I am also grateful that they are taking on a burden for Michigan that exposes them to constant frustration and even ridicule before they are ready to play. It’s their coach’s fault that they are in that unfortunate position.

There is nothing special about Michigan that prevents the staff from recruiting and retaining defensive backs. Every other school out there faces the same challenges to find academically qualified athletes that will stay motivated and develop and nearly every school in the Division I, FBS has done a better job than Michigan in regards to defense.

justthinking said...

Andy and BPD, I for one appreciate your answers to Christian's opinion.

No idea who he is, how old he is, or if he even resembles the dapper young man in his avatar - but too many people on blogs out there just immediately flame people for their opinions.

Glad to see a little patience and explanation in your opposing views.

All Class.

Mikoyan said...

I heard that Rich Rod was running the reactor at Chernobyl too....

Yost said...

JT, totally agree. Sadly, the M blogosphere - much like what passes for political discourse these days - is a shout down of those who offer differing opinions.