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Thursday, January 12, 2006

Hasty Scheduling of Vandie Signals New Coach for Michigan

In an unusual manuever, Bill "I'm not the bookie" Martin announced that Michigan would be naming a new head coach shortly by hastily adding Vanderbilt to the 2006 schedule. The last time these two teams met was 1969 (note to self: confirm Vanderbilt still has a football team) , Glenn "Bo" Schembechler's first game as head coach.

Insiders say that scheduling the Vanderbilt [do they have a nickname?]'s is similar to the white smoke (or is it grey?) signal from the Vatican announcing the Cardinals picked a new Pope. Michigan plays Vandie on rare occaisions. Before the '69 game (that sounds fun), Vandie and Michigan played in 1923 (you may remember that game, Yost). In '69, the two teams met in Ann Arbor, on a Saturday, Sept. 20. In '06, the two teams will also meet in Ann Arbor, on a Saturday, Sept. 02. The hasty scheduling of Vandie on this particular date can only mean one thing: Michigan will have a new coach this Fall.

Who will it be?

Interestingly, Middle Tennessee State's 2006 schedule also includes a September 2 date with Vandie. http://goblueraiders.com/?go=Schedule&Sport=Football&season=2006. The internet don't lie.

Who will show up? Where? Who will be Michigan's new coach? Does Vandie have hot cheerleaders? Stay tuned.


BaggyPantsDevil said...

Another fairly reliable sign that a coach is on his way out is when he receives a public vote of confidence from the athletic director, like Lloyd Carr just did from Bill Martin. For some reason, an AD saying, “coach [insert name here] has my full support” translates as “I’m about to fire coach [insert name here], I just need finalized things with his replacement and need to stall for time” in AD-speak.

The Vanderbilt Commodores—Cornelius Vanderbilt gave himself the semi-quasi military rank of commodore, get it?—have been to the SEC what Northwestern was to the Big Ten, athletically challenged but destined to be everyone’s boss eventually.

This season was a good one for Vanderbilt, they went 5-6. I actually managed to see the Vanderbilt-Florida game and the ‘Dores played well, taking the game into overtime. Vanderbilt had a chance to win the game in regulation but was robbed by some Sun Belt Conference-like officiating. When they recovered an on-side kick and then scored to get within one point with 54 seconds remaining, they were flagged for excessive celebration. It was hardly excessive and this was a freshman who’d just put his team in position to win the game. It’s Vanderbilt guys, they could actually beat Florida, cut them some slack on being excited about it. The fifteen yard penalty put them out of 2-point conversion range so they settled for tying the game. Florida finished them off in overtime.

Anyway, they lose their standout quarterback, Jay Cutler, so they’re not likely to be anywhere near as “good” next year. Additionally, they replaced the Middle Tennessee State game with the Michigan game. Apparently, Middle Tennessee owns Vanderbilt and I guess they figured if they’re going to lose, they might as well get paid for it.

The cheerleaders seem reasonably hot—which to me is young, fit, and wearing a short skirt with exposed midriff—but their mascot has the ridiculous nickname of “Mr. C” and looks some sort of cartoon Andrew Jackson. Check it out here: http://www.vanderbilt.edu/cheer/mascot.html

Wangs said...

The Commodores? Nice.

Did Lionell Ritchie used to play for them?

Do their rivals call them the Commodes? Do they have rivals?

Mr. C? Does the 'Fonz wear his leather jacket or the first season cotton one to the games?

Are these southern gents living in a time warp - trapped in the '70's. Of course, nothing unusual for Southerners to be in a time warp.

Agree with your definition re: hot. The bare midriff is key.

IC said...

"Mr. C? Does the 'Fonz wear his leather jacket or the first season cotton one to the games?"

Hilarous. To paraphrase Ralph Malph, "You've still got it!"