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Thursday, November 03, 2011

Happy Birthday, Coach Hoke!

Yes, 53 years ago today, Coach Hoke entered the world: already donning a leather helmet, some menacing eyeblack, and clutching a pigskin under one arm. It is rumored that his first words were "toughness" and "accountability" - but that could just be an urban legend. Based upon what I know of Coach Hoke, I tend to believe the former. The man was born for football.

Growing up, there was a sign that hung at the entrance of his childhood home: "Life is spelled F-O-O-T-B-A-L-L." That phrase pretty much defines Coach. Before every game in high school, he would head out to his garage and hit a punching bag for a while: followed by sitting down at the piano and plunking the keys a bit and maybe hit the snare drum for a while. Then, it was go time. Always moving. Always trying to improve. That's Brady Hoke. Even then, he was going to compete, as hard as he could, and he was going to win. He has brought that mentality with him to Ann Arbor, and boy does it show.

So, in honor of Coach's birthday, I decided to see what other November 3rd babies were out there. Who else shares this day of honor, you ask?

The one and only Dolph Lundgren. Ivan Drago. He and Coach both have something in common: a master's degree in Bad Assness. That is a real degree at Ball State. Seriously.

Charles Bronson. Star of "The Dirty Dozen" and "Deathwish." Yet another bad-ass born on 11/3. Coach was actually offered a small role in "The Magnificent Seven" opposite Bronson as a gun-toting two-year-old with a set of spurs and an attitude: but, his mom felt he should concentrate on blocking and tackling instead. Thank you, Mama Hoke.

Roseanne Barr was also born on November 3rd. It has been rumored that she calls Coach Hoke every year and sings him her own screeching rendition of "Happy Birthday." Not the best present.

And then, there's the man of the hour: our coach.

Fans, I've gotta say: as a die-hard Michigan fan since the glory days of Bo and Ufer - and with Hokeamania in full effect and sweeping across the Wolverine nation - I couldn't be happier on this November 3rd. Michigan is back, my friends: and soon to be better than ever - thanks to having our fearless leader back on the sidelines for the maize and blue.

So, Happy Birthday, Coach Hoke! Thank you for all that you have done for us. You embody all that is a true Michigan Man to me, and I couldn't be more proud to call you our coach. Thank you for always leading by example, and for your unwavering commitment and undying love for the university that we hold so dear. Best wishes for a great year - and many more great seasons - ahead.

We sure are happy to have you home!

][V][ GO BLUE!


Dennis said...

I'll give him points for toughness for listening to Rosanne sing. However he loses points for not getting callerID and not picking it up when she or an unidentified caller calls on his birthday.

I also applaud you comparing him to Drago. I guess that makes Luke Fickell Rocky? I'd say Dantonio would be Apollo Creed, but you didn't kill him, let alone beat him. And Dantonio has none of Creed's charm. So maybe I'm reading to much into that one.

Given his heft (and I have my own, so I know of what I speak) I'm suprised you didn't give a nod to John Montague, 4th Earl of Sandwich, inventor (sandwich) who was born in 1718.

Or given your new corporate overlord, Adolf Dassler, founder of Adidas was born today in 1900.

In the tougness category Bronko Nagurski, who's name transalates to Bad Ass was born today in 1908. Godzilla, King of the Monsters, was released Nov 3rd, 1954.

In 1958 on November 3rd, the day Hoke was born, the USSR conducted a nuclear test. Coincidence? Or explanation.

His 20th Birthday present was from NBC and was the first episode of Diff'rent Strokes. Iran, either upset that Hoke turned 21 or having to deal with a year of Gary Coleman, seized the US Embassy.

phil said...

Dennis - you left out an obvious November 3rd fact: 11-03-2010 Coach Jim Tressel thinks about telling the AD and NCAA about the illegal activity in his program but after thinking about it for 3 seconds, decides not to.

Bigasshammm said...

Yost I feel it is your duty to update this post as Gemma Ward was also born November 3rd.

David said...

Although another Michigan blog gets all the traffic there is no doubt that MZone is loyal and true blue. Keep it up. I am proud that Brady Hoke is Michigan's coach.

Mikoyan said...

That is a very fitting tribute.

Dennis said...


According to you guys didn't that happen every day for about 10 years? :)