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Friday, September 09, 2011

"But honey, the game doesn't start until eight!"

After a looooong hiatus, Title IX returns with some useful tips on how to get ready for Michigan's late kick-off versus Notre Dame.

Oh yes M Fans. This weekend marks a huge milestone in the history of Michigan football...A NIGHT GAME !!!

Once upon a time, kick-off was at 1 pm. Always. Period.
Then,TV got into the mix and the new-fangled start times like 12:30 and 3:30 came into vogue. We all have our "schedules" for those times...when to light the grill, how many beers to pound at what time, when to pack up the party and head to the Big House etc... but none of us yet knows how to prepare for the eight o'clock kick.

Until now.

As a public service to you, our dear (mostly male) readers, your favorite sideline chick (next to Erin, duh) is going to help you prepare appropriately for the 8 o'clock start. Because when your lady love finds out that the game doesn't start until 8 pm, you will be confronted with the worst of all situations...the "honey do" list.

So, here is how you respond to the inevitable, and get football alllll day:

If She says: "What a great day to get the gardening done!"
You say: "Right you are, honey! I can mow the lawn early because all the guys will be here at noon to start watching the early games!"

If She says: "Could you just take the kids to practice first?"
You say: "Sorry, I have to mow the lawn before all the guys get here for the early games."

If She says: "Let's go have a nice lunch at the mall together."
You say: "Here's a better idea, why don't you make us breakfast in bed before the guys get here at noon to watch the early games?"

If She says: "But you have all day to install that new fixture!"
You say: "Honey, I would love to get that done, but you know, I just can't risk blowing the electrical circuits before the guys get here at noon to watch the early games."

If She says: "How about we go visit my sister and her kids for the afternoon?"
You say: "But your brother-in-law will be here at noon to watch the early games."

If She says: "Can you do the grocery shopping today?:
You say: "Actually, I already went to the store and got all sorts of things for the guys. They'll all be here at noon for the early games..."

Easy, see?


Andrew said...

thank you...i laughed out loud..."but he will be here for the early game...brilliant!

KillaB43 said...

Hurray!!! Title IX is back. I missed you girl.

TitleIX said...

Thanks! I've missed y'all too!

I am fired up for game day!!!

KillaB43 said...

Yeah night game can't get here soon enough. Wish I could come up and tailgate. Ohio State losing to Toledo will make my day even better