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Tuesday, January 04, 2011

'Twas the Night Before The Evaluation

'Twas the night before The Evaluation, and here on the 'Web

I was still blogging away when I should be in bed;

The Photoshops were posted on the MZone with care,

In hopes that Jim Harbaugh would come to A2;

It was time for a change after Rodriguez's spread,

Ugly visions of the Gator Bowl still dancing in my head;

So I in my jersey and big block M cap,

Had just settled down to write a long coaching search rant,

When out front on State Street there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from my laptop to see what was the matter.

Away to the window I flew like a flash,

Tripped on my M slippers and almost fell on my ass.

The moon on the breast of Schembechler Hall

Caused me to choke up and nearly to bawl.

When, what to my watering eyes should appear,

But a middle-aged man I'd seen on TV for the last year,

Even though it was late and the coincidence was random

I knew in a moment it must be Dave Brandon.

More rapid than Pryor will leave C-bus in shame,

I whistled, and shouted, and called him by name;

"Hey, Brandon!  Yo, Dave!  It's Yost from the MZone!

Let's talk!  Let's chat!  About this decision you postponed!

I know you have said that you are in no hurry.

But many of us Michigan fans are starting to worry!"

So up to my house Dave Brandon did walk,

As we stood on my porch and started to talk.

I'd always seen him as arrogant and a bit condescending

After he tried to move The Game from the regular season's ending.

He was dressed in a suit from his loafers to his tie

I just hoped he wasn't still thinking like some pizza guy.

I said Michigan deserved a real defense again

Not the joke that was mocked daily on ESPN

Next I told him I thought Rich Rod didn't fit

But try as I might, he wouldn't tell me jack shit

Then I flat out asked him, "Is it gonna be Jim?"

But even point blank, he wouldn't give in.

So I tried a new tactic and blurted out, "Drew Sharp is a dick!"

And his body shook when he laughed as he agreed with my quip.
Suddenly, a wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

Then he said he must go, he had to get back to his work,
And thanked me for the laugh about Drew Sharp, the jerk.

He was going back to his office to finish the evaluation 

That would impact the whole of Wolverine Nation.

So off of my porch, down State Street he went,

While I felt better having gotten to vent;

But I couldn't resist before he walked out of sight:

"Don't fuck this up, Dave!  You better get it right!"


Temp430 said...

It's going to be Hoke so you better start getting your head around that between trips to the can to puke.

dtw2phx said...

The dude at Whale's Vagina State? Oy.

Yost - Great rendition! Two thumbs way up. ;-)

srudoff said...


Andy said...

Ding Dong the witch is DEAD.