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Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Buckeye Brad's Stud Mobile

So, what's it like to travel in style as a Buckeye fan? Check out the pic below that MZone reader Tom sent our way of a Buckeye named "Brad" cruising the streets of Ohio in his sweet-ass ride...

(click here for larger view)

Folks, it's not just the $4 dollar window flag on Brad's bitchin' Cavalier proudly proclaiming his Buckeye pride that lets the ladies know they're hanging with a smooth operator. No, sirree. It's the personalized license plate and the bumper stickers that tell the story of the man behind the wheel of this Buckeye babe machine.

Being a safety guy, the bumper sticker on the left promotes seat belt use and reads, "Please stick it in...it's the law." Get it? "Stick it in." Oh, Brad. Brad, Brad, Brad. You sly master of the double entendre, you.

The bumper sticker on the right says, "Tell your boobs to stop staring at my eyes." Brad-meister. Goddamn, you funny, funny, motherfucker. Shit, my side hurts. Actually both sides - one for each bumper sticker.

And how does the owner of a kick-ass Cav like this one top the double whammy of bumper sticker brilliance: Bam! - personalized license plate. First, he gets the one with the Ohio State logo, you know, to match the window flag. Check. Then, after standing for hours at the Bureau of Motor Vehicles thinking, mulling, trying to come up with the perfect topper to his pussy wagon, Brad strikes gold: BRAD69.

Naturally, Brad can barely contain himself upon hearing it's not already taken. Surely some other Brad - every other Brad - had to have scooped this up years ago. But, alas, no, Brad, you are the one. The chosen one.

Duh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-NUH! Go Bucks? Not today.

Go Brad!


Hemlock Philosopher said...

He needs to put a fart pipe and some spinners on that pimp-mobile. Only then will he be dusting muff with that buckstache (you know he's got one).

DaBraylon17 said...

Hey Yost! I have a photo for you that relates to this one you just posted. I will send it your way as soon as I can. You'll love it.

j said...

That's not just a Cavalier. That's a Cavalier LS with "Lohan Simulated" blowup doll in the passenger seat.

WingRG said...

While i'm on board with making fun of his bumper stickers and vanity plate, you might want to hold off on making fun of his car, considering it's made in MICHIGAN. Just my 2 cents.

lane said...

said to my wife on countless occasions - since when did CAVALIERS become a 'hot whip' (trying to be as hip as i'm not!!)?

gh said...

Cavaliers were made in lordstown, ohio.

Just outside of Youngstown.

WingRG said...

My bad, i just figured that all american cars are made in Detroit. I guess "global" economy has passed me by. Carry on with making fun of the Crapalier, then. ~WingRG

Corey said...

Even though this car doesn't have hitch ... me thinks he needs to add the ball sack hanging from the back

Herringbone said...



Thought you guys might like this one


Mikoyan said...

He needs the fart plug, bitching wing and the white tail lights to truly be a babe magnet.

I have nothing against Cavaliers per se, I had two of them. They're not bad cars if you take care of them.

Killing My Liver said...

Ten bucks this guy has a gold chain with a cobra head or an "O" on it, nestled deeply in his chest hair, which he proudly displays.

Merrick 561 said...

$20 says that Brad is a 40 something unemployed Ohio St. Graduate who "cruises" campus attempting to pick up chicks on Game Day, since He keeps getting older and they stay the same age.

Out of Conference said...

I think we've narrowed down the true true identity of Subcommandante Wayne with his new ride.

surrounded in columbus said...

actually, some of the most ardent, bizarre, and poorly behaved buckeye fans are the ones who never made it to school. Ufer's line about a tosu sell out being 10000 alums and 75000 truck drivers is a little exagerated, but not by that much when it comes to the "Brad69" crowd (gawd i hope the "69" refers to the super sophs and not something else).

TitleIX said...

that is SOOOO not a Kodak moment.


MGoBlue93 said...

Sru.. you're absent from this post; is that YOUR car?