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Saturday, September 08, 2007

MZone Exclusive: Mike Bellotti Interview

In an MZone exclusive, we sat down with Oregon head coach, Mike Bellotti for an interview earlier this week to find out what he was doing to get his team ready to face the wounded Wolverines.

YOST: Mike, thanks for talking to us.
BELLOTTI: Who the fuck are you?
YOST: Yost. From the MZone. The Michigan college football blog? The one that has a lot of semi-naked co-eds but offers scant football insight.
BELLOTTI: (pressing intercom) Judy, how did this asshole get in my office?
YOST. Mike, Mr. Bellotti, please. Just five minutes.
YOST: Wait...you can't kick me out.
BELLOTTI: Why not?
YOST: Because...because, uh...Phil Knight said so.
YOST: Swear to God.
BELLOTTI: (sitting back down) Five minutes.
YOST: So what did you learn after watching the tape of Michigan's game last weekend against Appalachian State?
BELLOTTI: We didn't see it.
YOST: You didn't?
BELLOTTI: (shakes his head) We don't get BTN and Jim Delaney wouldn't send us a copy of the game unless we promised to carry the network for free on the jumbotron inside Autzen Stadium.
YOST: So how did you prepare for Michigan this week?
BELLOTTI: Same way everybody does - we just watched the Syracuse game from '98 when Donovan McNabb shredded the Wolverine defense. We didn't need to watch anything more recent because the same thing has worked against them every time for the last nine years if you have a mobile quarterback.
JUDY: (over the intercom) Mr. Bellotti, Phil Knight is on one to discuss which of the 586 Nike uniform combinations he wants you to wear this weekend.
YOST: Gee, would ya look at the time? Gotta go. Thanks, Mike.


Ryan said...

Looks like somebody's been pilfering M-Zone material like crazy: http://sports.aol.com/fanhouse/2007/09/04/college-football-songbook-you-paid-that-cupcake-to-come-in-and/

Yost said...


Thanks for pointing that out. Much appreciated.

Sgt. Wolverine said...

I laughed out loud at the "Phil Knight said so" line. (Fortunately, I no longer have officemates to give me odd looks when I laugh out loud.) Outstanding.