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Friday, August 24, 2007

Red River Rivalry: Dangerous To Your Scrotum

Sometimes I'm sorry I check my inbox. Case in point:

A Texas fan who walked into an Oklahoma City bar wearing a Longhorn t-shirt was viciously attacked by an Oklahoma Sooner fan who tore the man's scrotum.

Yes, you read that correctly: he tore the man's scrotum.

According to the OKNews.com story linked above, the UT fan and a friend entered the bar where they were immediately accosted by Allen Michael Beckett, an alleged OU "fan," who began screaming at the Texas fan, calling him "everything under the sun" for wearing his Longhorn tee into the establishment. After trying to ignore the guy's abuse for 20 minutes, the UT fan and his pal finally just went to the bar to pay their tab and get the hell out of Dodge (or Oklahoma City in this case). But when the UT fan turned around, Beckett grabbed his crotch and refused to let go.

The UT fan hit the Sooner fan several times. Yet even after bar patrons intervened (although being Oklahoma, the story fails to mention whose side they intervened on), Beckett didn't let go the Longhorn fan go until he heard his scrotum tear and blood began to run down his leg.

It took 60 stitches to close the wound. Beckett has been charged with aggravated assault and battery (although they should add hate crime as well. Because if tearing a man's scrotum isn't a hate crime, folks, I don't know what is).

Even worse, we here at the MZone have learned this isn't the first time such a "scrotum attack" has happened to a Texas fan who stumbled into an Oklahoma bar as evidenced by the shocking...




If you're still scrolling down...

...you've been warned.

Just remember, you can't unring a bell.

My sincere apologies for the coffee now dripping off your computer screen.

All kidding aside, I hope authorities throw the book at Beckett...then kick him in the balls as hard as humanly possible.

P.S. Oh, and to all of you who now want gouge your eyes out with a tongue depressor - just be thankful you didn't have to Photoshop the original picture. Trust me on that one.

(HT: SpankyToes)


Bo said...


Bo said...


Bo said...


beast in 'bama said...

This calls for Biblical justice. Anybody got Jackie Sherrill's number?

beast in 'bama said...

Re: Disturbing Photo - is that Sting?

surrounded in columbus said...

ah, maybe i don't want to know, but just what the hell is the baby powder for?? keep the noose from chafing?

Mr. Parker said...

Nothing will ruin your day quite like having to get your scrotum stitched up from being ripped apart.

Out of Conference said...

I guess the Texas fan should have just said, "I love Crepes" and be done with it.

Matt said...

Hmmm. You never really know. Beckett might have actually been a Texas fan who was so glad to see a fellow Longhorn. Sometimes it's just so hard to let go.

I had a nightmare last night that we lost to Illinois.

TitleIX said...

you are a sick man
how the F did you find that picture???
personal library?
You Tube?
I mean, seriously....there are some kodak moments NO ONE needs! ;-)

buckidrummer said...

I never want to hear another powdered donut complaint again!!

MagnumTrojan11 said...

Now I know why everything is bigger in Texas. Streeeeeetch it!