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Saturday, June 09, 2007

Mr. Toad's Wild (Wheelchair) Ride

Oh...my...God. This has nothing to do with college football, but I'm still shaking my head: A 21-year-old man was pushed down the highway at 50 mph for several miles after his electric wheelchair got stuck in the grille of a semitrailer while crossing the street.

Yes, you read that correctly.

According to the AP story above, the man, who suffers from muscular dystrophy, was crossing at an intersection in Paw Paw, Michigan, (which is about 140 miles west of Detroit) when the light changed to green while he was in front of a semi. The semi started moving, the handles got stuck in the grille...and the next thing the poor guy knew, he was hurtling down the highway like some stunt out of JACKASS III.

Thankfully, the story has a happy ending.

A couple of undercover cops happened to see what was happening, pulled over the truck and told the "disbelieving" driver. The man was unharmed although he was taken to the hospital as a precaution (and to clean the massive doody stain out of his underwear).

Can you imagine driving down the freeway with your wife or girlfriend and seeing that?!

REALLY COOL MZONE READER: "Holy shit!"
FORMER ASU CHEERLEADER WIFE/GF: "What?"
R.C. MZONE READER: "I just saw a man. In a wheelchair. Doing 50 on the highway. Stuck to the front of a semi."
FORMER ASU C. W/GF: "Damnit, Paul! What have I told you about drinking and driving?! That is the last three-way we're having with my old sorority sisters if you keep that up!"



P.S. Uh, what the hell are undercover cops doing in Paw Paw, Michigan?

13 comments:

Chuck said...

The cops were probably just driving through good ol' 2Paw.

hutchgoblue said...

or probably on an undercover meth lab assignment. hell, it's van buren county, meth capital of SW Michigan

beast in 'bama said...

So is this what you boys do for fun when you put the snowmobiles up for the summer?

beast in 'bama said...

One other question: Paw Paw?

I thought we Alabamians had cornered the market on eccentric small town names - Intercourse, Ankle Scratch, Remlap (Palmer spelled backwards), etc.

Out of Conference said...

Well, from what I gathered, the poor guy in the wheelchair decided not to get to excited about it. You know, he doesn't like getting carried away.



Ugh - that sucked.

Emarcy said...

The cops weren't looking for meth, they were looking for pot, which outside good ol A2 limits is punishable by death.

Anyone heard of Rainbow Farm? Just south of Paw-Paw, two activists were killed and their farm was burned to the ground. If you don't remember, its probly cause 9/11 happened days afterwards.

http://www.rainbowfarmcamp.com/invlvd.htm

http://www.hr95.org/Memorial.html

Out of Conference said...

Stephen Hawking just texted, "Space, bitches, space."

beast in 'bama said...

I have been informed by my colleagues that I was in error earlier, re: Ankle Scratch.

It's actually Scratch Ankle, Alabama. Thank you, Google Earth.

god of the whoppers said...

i am assuming the truck driver not only had a buckstache, but was returning from lane ave, having recently caught his masters degree.

Jim Harbaugh Scramble said...

somehow, someway does video exist???

and i believe that the driver was in disbelief, he was probably heffed up on goofballs and looking to stop at a roady's.

Peter said...

cops in paw paw, meth obviously

zen wizard said...

Thank God he's all right--that is truly a miracle.

zen wizard said...

Maybe the cops got a tip that there were Mau Mau's in Paw Paw.