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Friday, November 17, 2006

"I Hate Those Guys"

MZone sideline reporter IC jumps into the M-OSU fray this week, revealing the Buckeyes he most despises in his post below.

There's much to hate about Ohio State. This post focuses on the players (and one very contemptible coach) who have added more than a dash of hositility to this already rancorous rivalry.

Note that some star Buckeyes, such as Archie Griffin, Chris Spielman, and Eddie George are not on this list because I actually liked those guys--or at least respected the way they played the game. Also note dishonorable mentions for Brian Baschnagel and Tom Skladany, the former for his ridiculous name and the latter for being a crappy punter for the Detroit Lions.

Here are my most hated Ohio State Buckeyes:

5) Art Schlichter: At tOSU, Schlichter was often elusive like Fran Tarkenton and a clutch passer like Roger Staubach--two other quarterbacks who I didn't like as a lad. Despite his appearance on this list, I take no pleasure in Schlichter's pathetic life after college, which has been destoyed by gambling addiction and stints in 30 different jails (including a current sentence in an Indiana prison) for fraud and forgery.

4) Tom Cousineau: A Romanowskiesque linebacker from the late 70s who still ranks among tOSU's best. He was the first overall pick by the Buffalo Bills in the 1979 NFL Draft, but shunned the NFL for more dough in Canada (the Bills later traded his rights for a future pick that was used to select Jim Kelly.) Cousineau left Canada to play in the NFL, mainly with Cleveland, where he put up solid numbers. I recall a preseason game in the 80s when he was flagged for literally stomping on a fallen Lions ball carrier. Last week the Republican Cousineau lost by a thin margin to an incumbant Democrat in an Ohio state house election.

3) Cris Carter: His Pee-Wee Herman dance following a touchdown reception in the 1986 game was--like his subsequent "broadcasting" career--obnoxious and ill-advised (tOSU lost that game 26-24.) He hasn't always shown great judgement; losing his last year of eligibility at tOSU after accepting money from an agent and forcing his release from Philadelphia due to drug and alcohol abuse. He would have to be on football's first team of Guys Who Show Up Their QB by Making Faces on the Way Back to the Huddle. Oh yah, he's also an ordained minister.

2) David Boston: A first-class college receiver and a first-clack a-hole as well. Though very talented, his play was often overshadowed by his obnoxious behavior--never more so than his taunting of a trailing Charles Woodson on his way to the end zone in tOSU's '97 loss to Michigan. Boston's volatile personality, frequent injuries, and abnormal muscular growth almost make one wonder how long he's been hepped up on roids.

1) Wayne Woodrow Hayes: He wasn't quite as bad as the Ayatollah, but he did share some interesting traits with the former Iranian tyrant. I absolutely hated this guy. Still do. You know how you always have a special place for the first girl you kiss? (or so I've been told.) It's the same way with my feelings for Woody. My hate for him taught me how powerful hate could be. So I suppose I should actually show some gratitude. Thanks, Woody.

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

I don't know that much about Archie Griffin, but apparently he has been helping out with the "Please don't kill Michigan fans" campaign. And Eddie George has also seemed like a decent guy.

I kind of respect Troy Smith for his footwork when on the run, but I think he is overrated and Tressel is a cheater, so Smith is in bad company.

WhiteDawg said...

Are you trying to say that Charles Woodson was a classy player..HAHAHAHAH.. That son of a bitch was one of the most cocky and arrogant fuckers around. To bad Boston did throw that ball in his face after making that catch.

Anonymous said...

Fuck Woody. The buckeye faithful cannonize him, but outside of Cbus he was nothing but a mean spirited prick that absolutely no respect for "that school up north".

Rather run out of gas than fuel up in Michigan? Small minded indeed...

Anonymous said...

IC,

Still waiting for the pre-season promise of a Buckstache photo and the plowing of Holly Mangold for the Buckeye double-digit win season.

Anonymous said...

Witedawg,
There's a big difference between confidence and arrogance. Woodson was supremely confident because he knew he was the best player on the field every game during the 1997 season and he proved it by making huge plays every week and winning the Heisman. Boston may have thought he was "the best", but as the 1997 UM/OSU game showed, he clearly was NOT.

Go Blue!

IC said...

Anon 5:56:

I shocked and saddened that you remember my very ill-advised prediction.

In fact, that my claim that tOSU would not win 10 games this year was so egregiously wrong, I'm not worthy of (as you so delicately express) "plowing" Ms. Mangold.

As for growing a Buckstache...I've already unplugged the Norelco.

Ignats75 said...

In the spirit of fair play, here's my list of hated members of your side:

But first, my prayers for Bo. I just heard he was taken to the hospital again this morning. I hope such an important part of the hisory of this great rivalry gets to see this titanic competition.

#5) Jim Mandich. Traitor who played such a big role in the upset of the century.

#4) Hairball. His whining about crowd noise was like the punk kid who always ran to the principal to get you in trouble.

#3) Charles Woodson. Another traitor who killed us singlehandedly. (OK, he had Stanley Jackson's help.)

#2) John Kolesar. Another traitor (notice a pattern there?) who seemed to have played for you for at least 9 years.

#1) Desmond Howard. Traitor. How many times do I have to see the ultimate trash talk...THE POSE?

Andy said...

I just have to smile when I think about all the great Michigan football players that are from Ohio.

Bucks fans need to remember that Craig Krenzel was from Michigan.

Anonymous said...

To IC:
1.It must really upset you that Bo loved Woody.
2. Woody hated UM? Well, he was good at hype but I just read an article where Bo said that after his (Woody's) coaching days were over and he was near A2 that he would come over and talk to the team (at Bo's request).

Ignats75 said...

Along with one of my favorites all-time: Pepper Johnson

Lets not forget Vernon Gholston!!!!!

Anonymous said...

I'm with whitedawg on this one. Charles Woodson deserves to be taunted, raped, and shat upon everytime he comes near a football field. Utter garbage.

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