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Thursday, October 26, 2006

Your Life vs. College Life

Below is another installment of our semi-regular series.



Your Life: Trying not to get caught staring at the Texas pom pom girls like the cop in the far right corner of the above picture. Then, when you get home from game, suggest to your wife during twice monthly, you're-on-top-this-time married sex that she wear chaps like "those Texas cheerleaders" during next sexual encounter in mid-November When you get "that look," give her confused-bordering-on-hurt "What? I was just kidding" look back. Continue fantasizing about PICK ONE girl above who was completely grossed out when she realized you were staring.

College Life: Bummed that three of the girls above are in your Intro Psych class because you've slept with two of them which might blow your chance with the third. However, when she brings up "perve at game" who kept taking pictures of her during Red River Shoot Out, nod in understanding manner while chiming in how you hate freaks like that. When she tilts her head and gives you "Awww, that is so sweet look," Bingo! Complete triple play following Saturday after night of drinking games at various campus bars.

(Thanks to Scott for the pic)

21 comments:

Andy said...

I live in Austin.

This is not a joke...

Brad said...

My Life: Reading a blog at work wondering how much I can get away with before the boss catches me.

College Life 10 years ago: Looking at porn in the computer lab wondering how much I can get away with before the monitor catches me.

Sports on a Schtick said...

It should be noted that brad graduated magna cum laude from tOSU.

beast in bama said...

Chaps, bitches! Chaps!

ShaunTX said...

*sigh* Take me back to my college years.... I was captain stabbin'. Now I'm a pathetic cubicle jockey...

Theri Maa, Bhanchod! said...

I can't tell which life is the more fantasy of the two: The Texas girls in chaps and me boning them, or the fact that you guys seem to think i get it twice a month from the Mrs.

Again, thank you jerks for making me feel like hanging myself today. I look forward to next week's edition. and the co-ed showdown if that ever happens again

Gaaaaaame.....Cocks! said...

After reading the "space" blog a few weeks ago, Beast, your comment made me spew coke all over my office monitor. Now I've greatly increased the odds that Brad's "my life" worry will come true for me.

Scott Boswell said...

Pom pom girls naked under the white vest and the chaps.

Hot damn!

willinsacto said...

Man I miss College Life...even if it was 5 years ago.

Charlie Brown said...

Genius. That's the story of my life summed up in two paragraphs. One caveat: you forgot to mention the occasional/regrettable "ugly girl" Tuesday night hook up -- except I'd now give my left nut to hook up with the 5'4", 105-pound "ugly girl" now.

Anonymous said...

I pray to Judas that the chap girls accompany the team to
Lu-buttock this weekend. Please, God grant me this wish

Brad said...

sports on a schtick,

That was low. I didn't say I was at the Washtenaw public library. Besides, if you were at UM 10 years ago, you would already know quality pickings were slim. From my recent visits it does look like things have improved somewhat though. Dammit.

Sports on a Schtick said...

If anything brad you're a pioneer. If folks like you weren't downloading boobies on a 28.8k connection years ago, this whole internet thing might have gone the way of Pet Rocks and New Coke.

Anonymous said...

Guys you have my deepest sympathies. When I was in college I was a science geek doing inexperienced girls from my lab section. Now I have a wife who will try anything. AND, she has friends!

I guess it is because you are Michigan men.

Anonymous said...

I'll take the one in the chaps

Anonymous said...

Anon 5:51 - please don't tell us about your Brokeback 'Shoe moments with your 'wife' and his friends.

GC said...

I just don't get this fascination with the chaps. Sure, they're useful when riding about on horseback, but on cheerleaders?? Unless you've got a leather fetish or something they're not sexy, and these girls would look a lot better without them.

Yost said...

Not sexy? Oh, GC. GC, GC, GC.

GC said...

Yost,

Fetish duly noted. ;)

Seriously, you don't see the FSU cowgirls wearing them.

You've been staring at UM's soccer moms too much. Here's what real cheerleaders look like:
http://www.usc.edu/student-affairs/IMREC/spirit/song/media/2004fball_05.jpg
Better with chaps??

Anonymous said...

Are you saying you get it twice a month and sometimes she gets on top? All I can say is your life is better than mine....by a bunch!

jen said...

gc likes boys with chaps