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Wednesday, September 27, 2006

You're The One For Me, Fatty

I know he's fat.

True, he vacuums confidence from me everytime he crosses himself just prior to the snap.

And how he missed that chip shot against Sparty last year--almost costing us the game--I'll never know.

But I post here today to praise Michigan kicker Garrett Rivas.

As the Wolverines head to the site of his greatest accomplishment--capping Michigan's best ever comeback in a 38-35 win at the Metrodome in 2003--I think our chunky PK deserves some love. He has connected on 8 of his 9 field goal attempts this year, including a couple of momentum-keepers against Notre Dame.

So sure it's fun to make fun of him. And yes, I am nervous whenever he approaches the ball. But to Garrett Rivas I say, "Thanks. Keep up the great work!"


Anonymous said...

My problem is, I give no credit whatsoever for successful FGs under 40 yards. If you make it, GOOD, that's what you're SUPPOSED to do. Anything less is a FUCK UP. I also do not give the center any credit whatsoever for successfully snapping the ball to the QB, or the long-snapper successfully snapping the ball to the punter, or the QB successfully handing off the ball to the RB, or... well, you get my point.
Yeah, Rivas is okay. But I judge him on his percentage of successful FGs in the 40-50 yard range. What that percentage is, I don't know, but I think it's fairly mediocre.

IC said...


I understand your point, but I would lower the fuck up threshold to misses under 35 yds. for a college kicker.

Rivas is 2-3 beyond 40 yds. this year, conncecting from 40 and 48 with a 42 yarder blocked.

Although I think Rivas is only good (not great) this could be an important advantage for us vs. tOSU, as their combination of kickers are currently 4-8 on field goals this year.

JohnS said...

As unfathomable as it seems, Mr. Rivas needs only 37 more points to be come the all-time leading scorer in the 127 year history of Michigan football, passing Mike Gillette, Tyrone Wheatley and Anthony Thomas.

usctrojan78 said...

How long has Rivas been the place kicker at Michigan? It seems like forever.

aladouche said...

Hey don't complain about your kicker...as least he can make some kicks...unlike the dude from Alabama

mike said...

lsuoverusc offed himself!

JohnS said...

Rivas has been kicking since 2003; which does seem like a long time. Phil Brabbs, a walk-on did much of the FG & EP kicking in the year before Rivas arrived.

Anonymous said...

greatest comeback ever? What about the sparty game @ home?

IC said...


The 2004 Michigan victory over Sparty (or "The Braylon Game") may have been more thrilling, but M's comeback over Minnesota in 2003 was from a greater 4th quarter deficit (down 28-7 vs. Minnesota; 27-10 vs. State.)

JosiahQ said...

It's a running gag amongst us UM expats here in "The Noog" (chattanooga), that Garret Rivas gets fatter with each game. We're hoping for Phil Fulmer-like weight by the time the tOSU game rolls 'round.

Anonymous said...

Say what you want, but he has delivered in the clutch more times than not. So far this year, he came up big vs. ND, last year he hit a huge fg in the 4th quarter vs Penn State (without it, Manningham's td on the last play would have brought michigan to within one point of sending the game to OT), beat MSU in OT in '05, was clutch on the road vs. Purdue in '04, hit the fg that began the comeback vs sparty in '04 beat Minnesota in '03, etc. To blame him for the Minnesota game last year is ridiculous. That was a total team meltdown. He will be missed next year.

Anonymous said...


my guess is this guy is trimmer than about 100% of posters here...