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Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Don't Mess with Texas...Lawyers

Unless you're a Texas fan, you've probably never heard of Joe Jamail. We hadn't either...until we saw the YouTube clip below.

Mr. Jamail is an attorney; a very, very wealthy attorney. That's because he represented Penzoil in a lawsuit against Texaco, won and was paid (insert Dr. Evil voice) one billion dollars.

And Jamail, who got his BA and law degree from the University of Texas, has given wads of cash to his alma mater. So much so that the football field at Darryl K. Royal-Memorial Stadium is named, you guessed it, Joe Jamail Field. Best of all, Jamail takes a mean deposition (he's the "arm" in the lower right hand corner of the clip).

Folks, we never thought such boring legal proceedings could be so entertaining. Then again, I guess they do things a little differently in Texas where Jamail and the other attorneys almost gave new meaning to the phrase "Hook 'em Horns."

Thanks to MZone reader Steve for the tip.


Anonymous said...

Too bad the tape stops before the fight begins.

Yost said...

I know, right? Keep rolling!

TitleIX said...

"I know you are, but what am I?"
5th grade girls can do better....
although I did like the little body fake the old guy gave.

By the way...this display of intelligent repartee isn't limited to Texas Lawyers, they grow 'em like that in Michigan too.

Harryfreeloader said...

I'm glad I don't live in Texas anymore-too many S.O.B's there. I wonder if this goes on in the White House, State Dept., CIA, Pentagon...

Cool Hand Mike said...

Gonna be a cold winter. So cold lawyers will have to keep their hand in their own pockets.

Anonymous said...

A new client comes in to a lawyer's office.

"How much do you charge?"

The lawyer replies "I charge $500 to answer three questions!"

"That's a bit steep, isn't it?"

"Yes it is, now what's your third question?"

Anonymous said...

I'm a Texas alum who just stumbled upon this through Deadspin, and trust me, most of us loathe Jamail. My friends and I joke about how much money it would take to get his name off the field.

Anonymous said...

God Bless Texas

LD said...

Jamail's legend stretches far. End of my first year in law school, one of the professors was giving a "Don't worry about the grades, you'll bounce back!" speech and cited Jamail. Story goes that he failed Torts his first year in law school. Failed. Had to retake it. Blah blah blah... billion dollar verdict. Now, things must've been much different back then, because it's really hard to fail any first year class these days. Maybe you pull a C- or even a D, but hardly anyone fails.

Cool Hand Mike said...

An attorney in Mobile, we'll call him Bruce, won a huge wrongful death suit at the age of 24. Several million dollars. First thing he did was buy a Soviet submarine(this was the late 80's-early 90's). Just because when he was a kid, he liked 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea. He brought it to Mobile and left it at the docks until it rusted apart. Why? He couldn't find anyone to run the damn thing. A law degree doesn't necessarily mean you're smart.

Anonymous said...

"go ahead and try it... you dumb son of a bitch"


Anonymous said...

Jamail may be more cuthroat and vindictive than any Afghan warload BUT, if your arse was on the line, you would give your left nut to have him represent you.

Matt said...

So THAT'S what happened to Larry "Bud" Melman!

Aram said...

Is this Woody Hayes risen from the dead? I'm half expecting him to rip up the down markers at the end of this.