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Monday, February 27, 2006

Just When You Thought It Couldn't Get Any Crazier at ASU...


Arizona State school administrators should stop kidding themselves and just make it official: ASU really stands for Arizona Sexual University.

One more time, let's recap: First there was Courtney Simpson (nee Cox), the ASU cheerleader-turned-porn star (and the M Zone BCS #1 seed). Next came the ASU student doing his best Pee Wee Herman impression by getting arrested at the library for spanking it to Internet porn because, as he said, "the connection at (his) dorm wasn't good enough."

Now, the latest at Sex U: a naked woman was seen riding a bicycle around the Memorial Union last week wearing nothing but a Sun Devils baseball cap and a pair of sneakers.

We have one thing to say to ASU students about this latest incident: SEND PICTURES!

ED. NOTE: In the "Too Funny to Make Up" department, when I spell checked this story before posting it, Blogger flags "ASU" as a typo. And the honest-to-God replacement suggestion it gives: "ASS." Hell, even Blogger knows what's going on in Tempe.

Folks, sometimes the comedy just writes itself. Although I'm beginning to wonder if the folks at Google have actually invented a computer behind the Blogger service that rivals the power of the Cray supercomputer and IBM's Deep Blue times ten. Or maybe they've even built a machine that can think for itself. Is Blogger just an ingenious way for Google to test its scientific breakthrough in artificial intelligence? I'm starting to believe it might be because - I kid you not - Blogger also flags "Buckeyes" as a typo. And the suggested "correct" spelling of this word that it does not recognize as part of the English language: Backwash.

Yes, AI is upon us, folks.

4 comments:

BaggyPantsDevil said...

There’s definitely something in the water there. Or maybe it’s the lack thereof?

Don’t forget the 2002 incident involving the videotaping of "Shane's World #29: Frat Row Scavenger Hunt 3" that involved four fraternities and the student government vice president--not as geeky as we all think, apparently--in a “sexual scavenger hunt.”

Then there’s the football program’s decision to disband the highly photogenic, liquor-purchasing, bed hopping Sun Devil Recruiters in 2004 after they’d been dubbed “hos to attract bros” in the student paper.

Check them out here: http://cactusranch.com/sdrecruitsm.jpg

Back when the Sun Devil Recruiters were still trying to entice recruits to Tempe, one of the football players, Zach Krula, hit the nail on the head: "We've got a lot of hot girls, we might as well utilize them."

As for the latest naughty Sun Devil, the funniest part--to me anyway--was the slogans she had airbrushed on her body which included: "No oil" on her chest. I haven’t seen this young lady, but what could be so bad about oiling up her chest? Or the rest of her for that matter?

Sean said...

There was a good picture of two hot chicks from ASU at an ASU football game, that really shows what they're all about.

Kirbdaddy said...

Any chick sporting those left wing slogans had to be total dog.

HomeFries94 said...

Any chick sporting those left wing slogans had to be total dog.

Talk about hitting the nail on the head, Kirbdaddy!