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Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Only in Ohio

So this doesn't really have anything to do with football or Michigan but a) it's about a guy from Ohio so for the sake of this site, let's assume he's a Buckeye (which will become even more obvious why when you read the story) and b) it deals with a sports bar which would be showing college football in the fall thus tying the story nicely back into our little college football blog here. Anyhoo...

Turns out a some would-be bar owner made a pretty bad choice of locations for his new watering hole. After investing over a half million dollars into his Legends Sports Pub and Grille near Akron, he learned a bit too late that he picked a dry district for his new bar!

True story. Here's the actual AP link.

Yes, folks, sometimes the comedy just writes itself.

Apparently, the state's Liquor Control board won't give him a liquor license so the guy is just going to serve food until a May election when residents will vote on a measure to allow alcohol sales in the district.

My question is, how does a guy this stupid have $500K to invest? And I guess he never heard of the old adage, "If it's too good to be true..." Can't you just see him telling his friends about his new venture: "I found this awesome location for my new sports bar. Get this - I'm only bar in the whole area! I'm gonna clean up! Can you believe it?!"

And God reached down from the heavens, touched the bar owner and said, "Lo, thy name is genius."

Thus, today's Darwin Award, Ohio Chapter goes to Mike Bolognue, restaurant (but not bar) owner


The King said...

I don't get any credit for sending you this link? That's two in a row for the Loef-Meister!

Yost said...

I gave you props on the last one. But Loef, let me remind you -- there's no "I" in "Blog".

The King said...

A man in your line of work should understand the importance of properly assigned credits.

Yost said...


An M Zone Production

In association with FH Yost Blogs

Written and Produced
FH Yost

Original Post Design
FH Yost

Link Insert
FH Yost

Starring FH Yost as "The Poster"

special thanks to Blogger, Site Meter, Loef, Braylon Edwards' catches against MSU in '04

The King said...

You'll be hearing from my lawyer.

DBuck said...

I would like to submit that he's most likely a Browns fan. This wouldn't happen in southern Ohio. The more toward Pennsylvania that one gets, the more of the occasional Ohioan imbecile you might find.

Yost said...

Damnit, DB, you're showing too much class on our site for a Buckeye fan. You haven't hurled any profanities, questioned every Michigan fan's sexuality, nothin'.

What are you trying to do, bring respect back to this great rivalry? Damn you, man. Damn you.

The King said...

Also, Darwin Awards are only for people who kill themselves via stupidity, thereby taking themselves out of the gene pool and furthering the eveolution of our species.


Anonymous said...

uh...I always thought it was the inbred hicks that were closer to Kentucky that were the imbeciles DB.